Friday, July 29, 2011

Destiny or just a dream?

I'm a dreamer ... in more ways than one. But what I mean specifically for the sake of this blog is the ability God has given me to see prophetically through my dreams. I guess in that since of the word, I like to think of myself as a "Seer."

I inherited this peculiar sensitivity from my mother. Over the years, the two of us have experienced direct communication from the Lord and from "others" — be it warnings or encouragement — through our dreams. We have seen some dreams come to pass, some that repeat and we even experience deja vu on a regular basis. For years I have journaled the ones that stood out the most; I guess not to forget them. Though the funny thing is, I couldn't forget them if I tried!

Sometimes I dream about things and the very next day something similar will be shown on television. Not joking! Once, I dreamed that 13 tornadoes hit Water Valley, Tenn. One week later Hurricane Katrina tried to wipe New Orleans off the map! Some believe God speaks through numbers — especially in dreams. The number 13, if we go along with that belief, is God's number for sin, rebellion and depravity. The same week I had that dream is the same week George W. Bush agreed with Israeli Prime minister Sharon to halt the "road map to peace" efforts, which forced thousands of Jews out of Gaza leaving them utterly homeless. Over 50% of New Orleans sits below sea level, and when Katrina hit, it turned the city into a literal "water valley," which also forced thousands of Americans from their homes. Looking a little less coincidental now, huh?

And I kid you not, as I am writing this blog, I was paged to the front desk here at the Herald offices to take a payment for an engagement announcement. During this interruption, the customer made a joke about my "ability to predict the future." She didn't know me before today.

My most recent dream was actually back in April ... I think. I didn't write that one down, so I guess it's good that I am finally making note of it now. Though, again, I cannot forget the things shown to me in these special night visions.

Now before I tell you the dream, let me first set the stage:
I have been out of church for some time. Don't get me wrong; church is still in me, but I have struggled for a place to belong for nearly a year now. The last church I attended regularly was LifeSong Lewisburg — wonderful church; I would recommend anyone seeking answers and a true experience of the spirit of God go there.

That aside, I have been in a "season of searching" in my life. I want more of God, but I find it hard to search him out in and of my own strength simply because of my present condition. I am a full-time-plus employee at The Daily Herald, full-time mother of a 2-year-old and full-time wife. I have to stop from time to time to remind myself to breathe or to at least make sure I still am! As hungry as I am for the Lord and his righteousness, I put that last on my to-do list. So sad!

Now, most Christian women in my predicament would perhaps look to their Godly husband for leadership and spiritual guidance during these dry times in life, but my husband, though Godly in his own way, is not spiritually mature to be the leader right now. And I stress right now! I'm not doggin' him; please don't think that. His time is coming. He is a man of God! It's coming! But as for right now, I'm starving spiritually.

Now I'm spiritually mature enough to know that my spiritual condition and practice is all up to me. So I have been visiting other churches as of late. But before I began visiting I would ponder in my mind where to start. These were secret thoughts and wonders known only between me and God of course. I just knew I needed somewhere new to belong, but I didn't know where that was.

Now I will present to you this dream:
It's winter, or so I think because I am wearing a coat and gloves and I feel chilly. I can see my breath. I am walking along a road — at night I presume because it's dark. I am nowhere populated. All I can see is the road a few feet in front of me at a time and the tops of trees — tall, tall trees have been buried by what looks like hundreds of feet of snow. It stands like walls along the road. At least I assume it's snow because again, I think it's winter. (When telling Robert about this dream he suggested that it could actually be ash. And that the cold and darkness could be from the sun being blocked out for some catastrophic reason. I pray not). Up ahead is a light. As I get closer I can see it's a small tent, but really a church. Suddenly I'm inside that church, only it's huge! I mean enormous! I'm sitting on the very back row with my back to the wall watching a play being performed by the church's youth group. As I watch it becomes clear that they are acting out church. Then I notice that the entire church is empty except for me and the youth pastor who is setting next to me. As big as this church was and as much as I loved the warmth, I felt the Spirit of the Lord say, "I am not here." So I immediately got up and continued on my journey. I rounded a bend in the road, and waiting on the other side was this tiny little church on a small hill. I read the sign, but cannot tell you what it said. I remember seeing the word "United." The lights are on so I go inside. It's an all black church. And it's size indoors is as adequate as it's outside appearance portrays. A friendly face greets me, a woman in her 30s-40s, and tours me around the classrooms and building. Then we passed the youth room where an explosion of the presence of God was going on. I felt the Lord there; he didn't need to tell me he was there. In that moment the lady was gone, and I was just standing there watching as this group of young kids, mostly black, were on their face before the Lord. Like gold being poured from a refiner's crucible, the Spirit of God just kept melting over them! It was like their spirits were continually revived — a constant state of revival. And then I woke up, or at least I assume I did because that's all I can remember.

Now ... I have drawn from this dream some metaphoric encouragement over the last few months. Many of you may know what me and my family are going through spiritually, financially, physically, emotionally, etc. I have used this dream to remind myself that I am not alone, that I am being guided along the path of God's destiny for me. I tell myself that I will rise from the ashes, that I will survive this storm and that there is a light around the bend in my road. But as many times as this dream has come to mind in recent weeks, I can't help but think that there is more to it.

I recently started visiting a church simply called "Destiny Church" here in Columbia. On my first visit the lead pastor and his wife were out of town so there was a guest speaker. I don't remember his name, but he spoke of the importance of being culturally diverse and being approachable by the people in our community. He spoke of being real and what it really means to minister to the lost.

Since my first day there I have learned that Destiny Church teams with other local churches in the Columbia community to feed the hungry, minister to the elderly or even ban together to repair and restore homes in the community that were otherwise desolate. 

But worst of all, their youth have experienced two deep tragedies since my first visit; they have lost two young girls in motor vehicle accidents — one 14 and one 17 — both within a month of each other. This church is being attacked for a reason — especially the youth! My guess is that they are doing something very right!

Now whether or not this is the church in my dreams I don't know, but I'm thinking I might keep visiting there for a little while. I mean, if all of hell is fighting so hard against them there must be something there, and I wanna be there to see this church and their youth continually vanquish the enemy!

I've posted this blog to mainly put my dream out there; to see if there are any other "seers" out there who may have an interpretation for me. Usually, I know what the dream means when it's given to me, but this time I just don't know. Perhaps that's because I'm depleted in so many areas right now.

So ... is there anyone out there who wants to try? Anyone wanna tell me what they "see?"